Easter Sunday!

This Sunday being Easter Sunday as usual plan of dropping Mom in Church early morning and planning to attend my service little later. As I was thinking of the day and in today's message as well it’s a reminder for me to think of all the areas dead in my life. As I kept thinking I could reflect and see myself being dead in lot of areas in my life. May be with my relationship with God, my personal commitments, my dreams, finances, holiness almost in every area of my life I could feel I'm not what I used to be. It’s a reminder from God that all the dead areas of my life He is breathing life into it. It may be like that of Lazurus who was dead and buried. But when God called him He was resurrected from death. This Easter Sunday be the last of all the dead seasons have recently experienced in all the areas of my life as everything is going to be resurrected. I'm not sure for who it is if you are feeling that everything is dead in ur life there is no future hope. There is no way around and no one to help or feel that you have have gone far far away from the Lord and you are not worthy of his resurrection power. It’s a reminder for you that God Loves you more than anything or anyone. His resurrection power is going to be manifested in every walk of your life where you feel nothing can be done and everything is dead. Experience His mighty resurrection in every walk of life this Season.

Reflecting Journey

In the last couple of years, had some interactions with few people gave very good experience. Some of them was too good, how a person can be so caring and out of they way someone can come and help when in need. Also few people though they can't be of big help knowing their inability to help still out of care they keep checking on every single day to make sure everything is ok and helping us to get over things, motivating encouraging and praying. Also I had few interactions with few people just broke the heart. After all the caring and doing everything beyond ability wasting all the time, money and energy just cos of the love and care for them. But when their things are taken care and when they found people with more money or who can be of better help they left and they are no where to be seen. Not being seen around is also fine, and not even having a little care about us is also fine, but the way they treat us once they get money breaks the heart. Sometimes its overwhelming cos we could have done all cos of love and care. How can be people so heartless without any love and care. Some times those breaking moments is needed to move on. Not everyone are destined to travel in our journey till the end. There are few people comes to our lives as blessing and few as lessons. Sometimes its really very difficult to forgive cos of the hurt. But I could feel God asking to forgive but its not that easy, its difficult. I have been struggling on that lately, of lot of struggle I have forgiven them. It was a time for me to reflect on how many times I have been like that as well to others, some times encouraging sometimes heartbreaking. If I would have been like that heartbreaking to anyone without my knowledge I ask of that forgiveness and will never ever do that mistake even without my knowledge and will be of encouraging to others. Also at the same time, its also a reminder not only to forgive them but not to forget what they have done in the past its not about grudge its about being aware of who they are and what they are capable to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. When they don't even realize what they have done, it’s a red flag and those people are not destined to be in our journey. As how we meet people in our train journey few people just have to stay around just for a station some of them for few more stations not everyone may be destined to travel through out. So lets not worry about who hurt and left us they are destined for us for a short period of time to teach a very valuable lesson to not repeat the mistake with anyone going forward caring, wasting time money and energy on anyone who don't appreciate. But at the same time there are few people who were sticking around even when we could have done nothing to them but they would have treasured us like anything those are the people who needs to be in the journey.

Unknown Destination

I was once travelling on my car to an unknown destination. The person has sent me the location to their place. As I have been out for the whole day and haven't charged my phone for a while. As I was about to reach the destination in 10 or 15 mins my phone completely got drained. As the phone is completely drained unable to check the location in google maps. Little impatient to wait for the phone to be charged to restart the journey. Quickly asked someone on the road for the direction and started the journey. After couple of turns and going quite a long way realized we have taken a wrong turn. Again when asked someone else they also directed again in a complete wrong direction and we almost went opposite to our destination. After the phone got little charged still unable to locate direction as the data wasn't working at all for some reason it wasn't connecting properly. Not sure of what to be done called the person who asked us to come. He then directed us with the exact route, following his instructions we were able to take an U-turn and get back to the direction where we need to go and we were able to reach the destination though it got little delayed but we were able to reach exactly where we wanted to reach. When I was thinking over this incident one thing I was able to relate was to our calling or destinations what God has planned in our lives. Most of the time we get deviated when we aren't connected to God and we be carried away by all who says as it’s the direction or the journey we need to take. There is nothing wrong in getting counsel there is nothing wrong in asking the direction as they will be able to guide with their experience. Though they are experienced and share with lot of concern and love sometimes they might not be able to guide to exact destination we ought to be heading. Cos they can share sometimes only with their intellectual experience or facts. But they can't see beyond the facts experience what God has called or what God has chosen us for and where He has planned to take us on a journey. Only God can reveal the exact destination where we supposed to be heading and He can only show the exact way to take. Sometimes even the intellectuals, experienced and the concerned people advices may lead to wrong turns U turns leading to the change the course of direction though it may seem to be all good but that’s not the way God really wants us to take. The path or the route sometimes God takes us or when we take those routes not listening to them others might think we are stupid or dumb head or arrogant not listening to their advice as it was shared with concern love and care. But that may be the exact path He wants us to take sometimes to make us fail to learn our lesson to break our Self to equip ourselves to make us strong on the journey so that we are well equipped enough to be in the place or the destination where He has called or chosen us for. We could only know the exact route where we ought to take only and only when we are connected to Him and seek His guidance that time only we can hear His voice of where He wants us to go. Though if we have failed listening to His voice and lead by others and gone far far away, still we can get back to Him and ask Him to redirect our paths of where He wants us to be He will guide us though it may got delayed due to some unknown or wrong directions taken we can still get back to where God really wants us to be in the journey for the destination what He chose us for.

Out of Tune

Once I happened to sit in a jamming session with a band of musicians. All the musicians where playing really good. The drummer was so very good in his rhythms and the bass guitarist was matching to the drummer with his grooves and kept the band live. The keys and the lead guitarist were also so exceptional. Lead female singer and the male singer were also singing very nicely and their harmonies were too good. But together when we were hearing something was missing. It was none other than the guitarist. Though he was playing too good and he is a good guitarist but it was missing something that’s when the keyboardist updated ur guitar is not in tune. Till that time he couldn’t recognise. The basic thing any guitarist does is tuning his guitar before rehearsing or playing. As soon the guitarist came he started to play directly as he was late he didn’t have time to tune or check. What a kind of musicians they were, every one was exceptional individually. But when they all played together it wasn’t sounding that good, just cos of one guitarist failed to tune his guitar entire team effort or the song which s hi upposed to be so soothing or comforting it felt so odd and it wasn’t even pleasant to be heard. This reminded me of something and gave a different perspective. How many times though we are multi talented hard working and with big goals and dreams cos of one habit or cos of one unwanted relationship or friends who are not tuned to what our dreams and goals have become the reasons our goals and dreams unachievable and the reason for shattering all our vision. It’s time to reflect and see if we can tune our habits or the relationships so they will be the motivators in achieving our dreams and making everything memorable rather shattering our dreams and making life miserable.

Halt!

Yesterday while I was driving in a heavy traffic suddenly felt the AC cooling drastically reduced felt AC wasn't working. In few mins the car started to Choke the speed suddenly started to drop. I keep accelerating but it was moving vey very slow. Couple of instances it was about to be stopped some how I managed to drive through. One point it almost halted in middle of the subway with such a huge traffic. Then I noticed on the dashboard a different sign which was blinking which never have happened before. I immediately called the mechanic and informed him about what's happening. He asked me to send the image what I see on the dashboard, I sent to him. In the meantime I somehow managed to drive through the subway and in the middle of the road asked the auto driver for any mechanic shop nearby for which he said there is nothing nearby. I somehow kept moving slowly though it had stopped couple of times, seeing the dashboard sign the mechanic called me immediately and asked me to stop the car from driving any further. He then went on to update me that the engine coolant is completely drained it will be super hot. He asked me to open the bonnet and check and it’s the same it was too hot. He said you are in a different place right now, I can't come but I will guide you in the videocall so you can do the workaround so you can return. I was clueless as I never had this issue before and never done that before. He said it will be very hot right now so wait for it to cooldown. Give some 20 mins time and then open that and fill with water for almost 2 liters and then check and see. I waited for almost 20 mins and the heat also has reduced and its cooled down. Then in the videocall he guided me, accordingly I removed that and filled with water. He asked me to start the car to check and see. Now the car started immediately and there was no signs on the dashboard. He asked me to check the AC felt it wasn't running. He asked to check the motor it was running again when I got into the car AC was also working. He said its just a workaround for you to get to home. Tomorrow morning leave the car for service to check the reason for the leak and the coolant filled to fix it permanently. As I was pondering on this a different thought came to my mind. How many times God would have asked to change our directions. We keep ignoring his voices, his signs like how I ignored the AC not working, chocking the signs on the dashboard. Until I got a clear warning from the mechanic to Halt. Sometimes God brings us to a Halt cos we keep ignoring all the voices, signals and the warnings. Then he lets us cool down think and then changes our course of direction. Though it might seem like a sudden Halt but he refills us to keep that journey going. What is that God has been asking you to change the course of your direction. Are you listening to his voices, signals. If we heed to those we can avoid that Halt or God has to bring us to the Halt to stop and change our direction.

Goa Trip!

I love long drives have been driving for couple of years. For official or with friends picnic it has become so normal driving long drives. Though the trips may not be that far from Chennai to Bengaluru, Madurai Kanyakumari, Pondicherry. Its always short trips and we often used to swap between friends while driving so we don't get tired during our travel. One time me & Solo decided to go to Goa only both of us driving. That time he was in business and I was working at that time may be around 2016. We reached Bengaluru in the night and made a surprise visit to meet Reuben and his family on his wedding anniversary we stayed that night and started early morning from Bengaluru to Goa. The Highway between Bengaluru to Goa was nice and also our journey was in the morning so we were ripping really fast on the highway. While we almost reached Goa when we were going through one forest/mountain kind of place we didn't have any signals to navigate and we found it so difficult. To add fuel to the fire the diesel was literally about to be emptied we were just crossing the fingers hoping to reach the main road where we could locate any petrol bunk. To our surprise when its about to fully drain we found the petrol bunk and we reached in the evening. As we both of us were tired we went out for dinner and we came early to sleep. I think we went during off season so there wasn't much crowd but still the normal party scenes was happening. We both were like wrong people in the wrong place at the wrong time. Both of us don't drink don't party that’s the place don't know why we planned first of all. We wanted to drive so long so we planned for it. Suddenly next day after lunch Solo said lets leave as its boring. Yesterday only we reached after a long drive also we didn't sleep a take rest. Normally I used to sleep min 2 or 3 hours before any drive that day we didn't take any rest. We started and I started to drive from Goa till Tumkur that itself was approx 494kms almost 9 hours drive and then I gave it to Solo to drive. He drove for a while and in a toll he tried to overtake a lorry and to which the driver got angry and he purposefully came and bumped in our car. That time my car was new and used to maintain well without scratches not like how its maintained now. He got upset and said he is not driving and gave it to me. Our plan was to go to Reuben's home in Bengaluru and rest and restart back to Chennai. When we were about to reach Bengaluru we called Reuben and he didn't pick up the phone so we thought lets go non stop to Chennai. I was already exhausted driving all th way from Goa to Tumkur and Bengaluru. After we crossed the Hosur we stopped for Dinner and we thought lets take a nap and we stopped near one of the tolls and slept. We thought we had slept for some half an hour, when my Mom called to check whether u guys reached chennai that’s when we know we slept more than 4 or 5 hours. After that Solo started to drive non stop and he drove so fast as I have to be in office in the afternoon. He drove too fast and we reached on time. This trip I will never forget. As I often used to tell we need to drive so long, but after this travel experience and the hectic drive and the tiredness in the journey. I made a clear decision no matter how urgent it can be without a proper sleep never going for a long drive. This is one another drive which I will remember for a long time, hope solo also remembers it.

Lockdown!!!

As soon as we hear the word lockdown lot of things keep running in our mind and everyone of us have different memories and experiences attached to it. For me it was altogether a different experience. Within 9 to 10 months of starting the business a major halt everything was closed. Not able to move out from home, Not knowing of the unknown. When the whole world was panicking no one has clue of what the future holds. Major businesses shutting down across cities, countries and around the world. Could experience only God's grace and provision. Without having any revenue or any money only God's favor. Landlord was so gracious at that time to me which I really don't deserve it. Without paying rents for couple of times she gave time to pay it later which never happened for many business for this reason itself many business have shutdown. Also sometimes she even leveraged me saying its ok and not to pay. Its only purely God's grace so the owner showed great favor. Almost we had 2 to 3 complete lockdowns over that 2 year period of time. But it was completely different experience for me. Explored three different things which I haven't explored it before. During the first lockdown did direction for one of the music video which came out Ok, it was my first experience but enjoyed that experience. In the second lockdown started writing lyrics thought it may not be so professional or outstanding but again enjoyed the new experience of writing lyrics and have a song composed. During that lockdown wrote lot of songs and it was another new experience of working with some nice singers and giving life to those lyrics with their tune. In the last lockdown my Dad also gone to be with the Lord it was again a very tragic experience. During that time to have change of mind started painting, again this I would have done only during my school days and never done anything after. When I started painting it gave a different kind of peace and happiness. I kept lot of paintings in the café which I painted that day one of my friends friend who came to dine suggested to frame it as its good some people may buy it. With some reluctancy after many months I framed all the paintings. And most of the paintings got sold out and few gave it for lucky draw in café for gift vouchers. It was all together a different experience. Though the lockdown was a serious area of concern over the business but eventually I was able to identify my creative side existed in few areas of my life which I could contribute a little bit and was able to have a different kind of happiness, joy and peace which money and material things can't buy. When I rewind and think of the lockdown only thing I could remember or reflect upon whatever may be the situation we are in it could be the end of the world according the worldly standards. There may be no way out and there is no future hope based on the situations circumstances or financial abilities. But even in that dead end and the life halting situations God can make a way beyond of what we could imagine and lead us in ways where our soul can find the real joy, peace and happiness where nothing of this world, money and material things can give.