Flower Shop surprise

After my Dad has gone to be with the Lord, almost for every festival or start of the day or any accessions I used to go to the cemetery with my Mom. It used to be regular habit used to get flowers from velachery where I used to buy regularly and take to the cemetery. Today being christmas thought will go to cemetery in the afternoon after the lunch. As we have shifted house to different place and so thought will buy in Saidapet on the route to Nandanam YMCA cemetery. After I have placed all the orders and I asked how much and whatever she said I gave the money. I never used to negotiate with the street vendors. She asked me for what purpose and where you are going. I said to her I was going to Nandanam YMCA cemetery as its Christmas and buying this to my father's tomb. Don't know what happened she called me and gave me a bunch of big floweres in my hand and said take it. I just thanked her walked 2 steps and again went back to her and asked Akka how much I need to pay for this please tell me. She said sir take it happily and you don't have to pay anything. I said thank you, but deep down by eyes were about to get wet with tears don't know why. This last entire month I would have spent a lot and got lot of new things. But I don't know for some reason that little flowers that Akka gave me to take it my fathers tomb on Christmas of surprise gave lot of happiness compared to every other expensive purchase I did in the last couple of months. It should have costed that Akka, but her gesture moved my heart. This is a sweet lesson for me, even little gesutres what others does to us of compassion or love that moves our heart. It’s a reminder for me to be also like that Akka more often to bring smiles to others.

Morning Beach Walk

When I used to work in the IT it used to be a regular habit for couple of years, I used to go to beach early in the morning for walk. It used to be very refreshing. It had been a regular practice for me until I started the café. After started the café cos of the late night closure of café and reaching home very late night couldn't able to get up early in the morning and eventually have stopped the early morning walk in the beach. Recently I was looking for shifting the house and that time initially I had the idea and was looking for houses near the beaches and for some reason I forgot that and totally looking for house near the place where I'm planning to setup my new office space for business. But something or the other was happening and it kind of getting dropped due to space restriction or pet restriction or we didn’t like the house at all. At that time one mediator said there is one house of what you are expecting but that’s little far from the place you are looking for. I just went and seen the place, I liked it and we finalized it. He though mentioned its near the beach only but I didn't consider at the point. Once I was about to finalize and shift that’s when I realized its hardly a 10 min walk to the beach. Though I haven't started going all the day to the beach. But eventually started going on some days. Unlike before I used to go for almost 5km walk in beach, but this time I just walk from home to beach and stand there and enjoy the nature and the God's one of the best creation. Just standing there and thanking God listening to the sweet whispers of the waves and seeing the mighty vast creation. It can't be more peaceful and refreshing to start the day. Sometimes we think lot of things don't go the way how we wanted but when it all happens at the end only we know that God didn't allow few things for reason and he allows them little late to ensure we are prepared and he fulfills the even tiny little desires of us.

Good Old days

Recently I was reading about Moses encounter with God in the Mount Sinai, Where he would be there in the Mountain and cloud would descent in the place. God's glory was filled in the mountain. Moses talked to God as if talking to a friend. He was there on the Mountain and would request God to show his Glory. God would say to him, He would die if his Glory is shown. He will tell him, I'll hide you with by hand till I pass by then you could see only my back. Moses stayed on the mountain 40days and night without food and water. And he had great encounter with God. When he came down everyone seen Moses face radiance with Glory which he wasn't aware. Moses will go to God for Israelites and his prayer and request would be to ensure God's presence be with him where God asks him to go. He would even say don't send us if your presence does not comes with us. It reminded me one of an incident in my childhood, hardly I would have been studying 2nd standard or 3rd standard. Since from childhood Mom used to say all biblical stories and also used to attend Sunday class. I was so curious and used to ask Mom I need to see Jesus. I want to see him. As a child had no limitation to think imagine and want. When Mom said you pray God will reveal Himself to you. I took it so seriously and used to pray very frequently and whenever possible without a single doubt to see Jesus. One night I just woke up from my sleep I was a bright light as a back of a person surrounded with blue luminous light. I realised it was Jesus at the moment and fear gripped so much and turned and slept I didn't even tell anyone. I stopped praying that prayer to see Jesus. When I was reading the Moses encounter recently I was reminded of this childhood experience. It as reminder for me to check how as a child my faith and how earnestly I used to long to seem him and for his presence without expecting anything in return. What happened to those faith and encounter? Even after getting saved the first love which I used to have for God just longing to be in just His presence expecting nothing. It faded away over the years. It was a reminder for me to get back to God as how I used to be in child without expecting anything just wanted to see Him and be with Him.

Good Bye!!

There are some good byes which we have to say in our life's. Some of them are painful and some of them are very meaningful very much needed in our lives to progress further. Some good byes we never wanted to say to few people things situation circumstances. But we could see God forcing us or creating situations to say good bye. We sometimes can't understand why and for what but at a later phase in life we could realize that good bye was a very much needed one that has transformed our life way better. In this year I have been saying good bye to lot of things people and situations in my life. I could see God clearly separating me from lot of things and preparing me personally to be equipped in lot of areas. This good bye which I said to something today was something which I have been with almost the last 10years almost every day most of the time, hardly I would have not been with it in days or week over the last 10 years. The one which gave me lot of memories, happiness, joy, experiences, travel, new places, lot of people, excitement, bonding, long drive, lonely drive it has been a place of my solace. My hideout, it has seen all my happiness, joy, sadness, failures, excitement, disappointments, cry, success, victory almost everything for the last 10 years. I could only say thank you Lord for giving it me for the last 10 years. It's none other than my car. If I look by 15 18 years before I used to dream and think will I be able to get any car. From dreaming about something to having it, from not knowing to drive or not wanting to drive until I had my own car to be driving it all the time to all the places for 10 years. And the care I used to give in the initial days months years without any dust and scratches. And that love faded over the years and the care stopped like I used to care in the initial days months and years. From caring fully to hardly taking care of it. It has seen the good times as well as the bad times. Accidents floods from no scratches to all scratches. As years gone my and lot of things have changed over the years when a time has come to say good bye to your most loved things. Rather that feeling sad or worried about letting it go. I'm cherishing every moment which God helped me to spend on it, from all the joyous to my painful moments which has seen all my laughter cry heard all my music. But from today on I may not have that one with me. I may get something better bigger or smaller worse it really doesn’t matter. I’m grateful to God for giving this journey a companion for the last 10 years which I will continue to cherish even if I get THE BEST cars in the world in the days or months or years to come. A good bye filled with little tears and lot of memories, missing more than a friend who accompanied me for last entire decade.

Unexpected Break & Breakthrough

Last month end, I was going through a very tough phase in my life. As if I was holding on to the last rope of hope with almost everything was crashing. Only a few close friends of mine would know the phase I was going through. It was like there is no way ahead and whoever knows my situation would know there was no hope. I could feel that God is clearly talking to me lot of things and He is preparing me for something. But in that situation when the breakthrough wasn't happening and when you are more broken its really difficult. At that time only Annie has comedown from Belgium, she was casually saying she has decided to go to Naallumavadi for the Prayer which happens every month end. Immediately priya also said she will join, Reuben who has never travelled in the last 6 years said he will also join. But there were lot of things going around me where I had to take lot of life changing decisions in my life at that point in time. Everyone forced me to join, I really wanted to go but my situation wasn't favorable as I was reluctant due to the lot of things happening at the same time. Annie booked the tickets and said you come. Even after the travel was planned last day before the travel I couldn’t confirm cos I had couple of important meetings which I can't miss at that important junction which I have been waiting to happen for months. But some how I made up my mind and I decided I will travel for this prayer. As friends think this is the first time we all travelled again others after marriage this is the first time we all are travelling for the first time, Avi was there already in Naalumavadi. As soon as we started the journey there was some peace of mind, it was a total break for me to think of all whats happening and the things what I was going through. The 2 to 3 days was a life changing moment for me personally. I don't believe in places, God answers our prayers wherever we pray sincerely as He looks only our heart. But for me for that breakthrough to happen which have been waiting for couple of months, I was able to feel in the spirit that time itself its done. Each one of us where going through different things but it was a needed break and breakthrough for all of us. I learnt this for sure, over the last couple of years I have been trying to do lot of things putting lot of my time, energy, efforts, money my everything but I couldn't see anything happening. Though I had all the Trust in Him, somewere I was trying to do a bit relying on my strength, now I know the next phase of my life is Going to be the other way around, not relying a bit on me and its going to be 100% relying on Him alone. Exactly a month after, on the same date of this month prayer couple of things which I have been waiting for couple of months happened. I could see God clearly guiding and taking me completely away from my existing situation, people, surroundings which have been draining all these years and placing me in a complete new environment and preparing for breakthough and the things which I have been waiting for all these years. If Annie didn't plan for the prayer or pushed for that prayer, I don't think I would have gone or all of us would have gone for that prayer. It was indeed a greater blessing for all of us. I'm not sure who is reading this, if you are going through a tough phase in life and thinking there is no way around, God is ready to make that way for you in an unexpected way. Just surrender to Him no matter how far you have gone or how far you have failed, He will bring you closer and you will be able to see His strength and all the success you have been waiting for.

Words

Normally my Mom used to water all the plants in the house on daily basis. Once my mom went to my sisters home for a week, so I had to water all the plants for a week. That’s when I noticed couple of plants were dried up and some were in almost dying stage. That time I remembered of seeing a video or reading somewhere about an experiment when you speak life to the plant you can see it growing and when you curse it dies up eventually. Just for few days I tried speaking life to those plants while I watered them for a short while I was amazed to see the major difference all the dried ones could see new life and growth. I just wanted to try whether the experiment was true or false was eventually able to see significant difference. That reminded me of how many times we personally would have experienced in our life. When we are with few people, how energised and charged with few people cos of their kind, appreciative, motivating words enlightening us, empowering us, even a failure person it gives the motivation that you can achieve big things. However there are few people when we meet them they drain out the energy completely from us by their words. Whenever we meet them we feel hurt if their words they speak they demotivate a person who can achieve and do great things can also become a person who can’t do anything just listening to them. How many times we have been a person who always motivates and speak life to other people’s lives or how many times we become the people who hurt our loved ones by our words and being a demotivating person for many lives. It’s time to think and be surrounded with people who can speak life into our lives and not the ones who drains and demotivates us and be the person who can speak life to other peoples life and not demotivating them.

Industrial Visit

This incident which happened during our college which we will never forget. Hope none of our college students will forget this. Forgot whether its first year or second year. We have been scheduled for an industrial visit in our college to Ennore. I was studying in Sathyabama Engg college. The college is known for its strict rules and regulations most of us would be aware of. When we studied it was part of the madras university and it was one among the top 2-3 college across the city. Though the college is very strict I also don’t study much but I always remain disciplined I had never ever bunked a class or taken even a single day holiday during those days. It was so planned to have an industrial visit for the entire batch of us from our department to visit the Ennore thermal plant. There were 2 buses arranged one bus with entire girls gang and the few very studious guys in the bus. The other with all the boys of the class in the bus. As we started the bus as soon as we exited out of the campus all the boys were so hyped and everyone was shouting and having a lot of fun in the bus. As we started our journey from Sholinganallur towards Ennore, suddenly what happened one or 2 guys from the bus started to plan to get down from the bus and go somewhere else. As soon as they got down every signal another bunch of guys planned something and got down either movie or hanging out or to malls each of the bunch got down with different agenda. Before we came near adyar almost the entire bus was empty hardly with 2 or three left. That time I don't know what was running on my mind even I got down with another 2 or 3 boys down the bus. We didn't do anything we just went each to our homes. I have never bunked a single class till that time in college don't know why I did that that too on our visit to industrial visit. We all didn't know what happened after that and we all went normal to our college next day. To our surprise our HOD has reported this incident to the director of college and the entire boys who all got down were given the office duty. Office duty is nothing but if anyone follow the rules or didn't do what they supposed to do they have to be standing in front of the office. As we all were standing then only we all came to know when the bus we all went and reached the location there was none in the bus when the staff who was sitting in the bus turned back to see he was so surprised. Director of college have instructed all our students to bring their parents to college to meet the director in person. That incident is so unforgettable we all bought our parents, now all our parents it was a nice opportunity for them to meet all their kids friends and even their parents. Though it was a very funny moment whenever we think of it we will always laugh. But that incident reminds me to think it from a different perspective. Though I had never taken leave to college even a single day unnecessarily though it was a fun trip to enjoy though educational when everyone started doing it we got carried away. There were lot of guys even very studious guys not like me also got down from the bus and they had to bring their parents. It’s a reminder to see are we getting carried away by seeing the crowd though we have our principles though we stand a lot to do right things we can be easily carried away when we want to be included and are not willing to be differentiated from the crowd. Though we may be that 1 or that 1% who didn't want to go with the crowd, are we willing to letgo of wanting to be included in the crowd compromising ourselves and our principles or standing out from the rest.